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the intelligent wants self-control children want candy hey this is Leo for actualised org and in this video we are doing another profound quote and the quote here is coming from Rumi and the quote goes the intelligent wants self-control children want candy I found this quote to be so deep so profound that I mean it really really inspires me when I hear it because to me this is this is this is the root of the problem with most of humanity and the reason that people are not getting what they want in life is because they are behaving like children and that they are after candy rather than what is truly important to be after which is self-control so let's talk a little bit about this elaborate on it and get you some more wisdom around this profound quote so Rumi first of all who is roomy roomy was a Middle Ages from the Middle Ages he is a Middle Eastern philosopher / poet / mystic and he has some some books that he published his poetry and his poetry is all based around a very like deep spiritual ideas it's based around enlightenment is based around wisdom it's based around like the core truths of life and like Mary deep psychological truths about about human beings so he has a lot of very pithy eloquent profound analogies and little short stories and anecdotes so if you are interested in that go ahead and check out one of his books you can Amazon it so that is Rumi about what is it what about what about this quote you know what can we say about it what is so deep here well I think that most people go through life and what they want is they want stimulation they want excitement right and this can manifest in all sorts of ways it can manifest in very very unhealthy dysfunctional ways or it can manifest in more healthy ways but either way it's still the search for candy for stimulation and I have a video that talks more about what is happiness you might want to check that out for a very deep definition of happiness which will dovetail nicely with this topic but what I'm talking about here is the following so let's say that you're a heroin junkie and you want a hit of heroin because you think that it's gonna make you happy so let's put that on one end of the spectrum there's that then you know what's another so what's a step up from that so there's heroin maybe a step up from that is cocaine you're you're kind of like a cocaine addict so that's a little better than heroin but still pretty hardcore drug so then we move you up another notch so what was that like marijuana pot okay maybe your pothead not not terrible but still not a not a really healthy way to live and the reason you're doing that is again because you you want that stimulation from that drug then the next step above that is maybe alcohol the next step above that is maybe partying the next step above that is stuff like video games and television and sex or any other kind of activities that you're doing because they're very pleasurable maybe the next step after that is food overeating or eating food just because it's making you happy using food basically as a as an emotional prop up like an emotional crutch then what's the next step from that we might say something more like relationships the next step up from that might be something like going to the gym and working out hard at the gym but ultimately the reason that you're doing that is because you're you're doing it for a vanity reasons because you want to look good for the opposite sex you want to be attractive you want to be sexy so maybe it's that you know what's the next step up from that it might be something like trying to get a really good job trying to get you know a nice a nice house and you might say well those are really nice things because a house that serves my family so it's very it's very functional a job a job is because it gives me satisfaction gives me fulfillment and you know gives me money I like having money on I have in a nice car nice having I like having nice things so you've got kind of this spectrum of activities that you're doing from from the very beginning here with heroin addict which is completely dysfunctional basically completely life it's basically leading towards an early death and then kind of moving your way up slightly better slightly better slightly better forms of stimulus seeking until you get to to this end which is maybe like pursuing a really nice career which on the surface it's very hard to to fault someone for doing that but in the end all of this stuff all of this stuff what you're doing is you're like you're looking for a hint you're looking for a hit of drug with heroin is very obvious what that drug is it's literally heroin with something like a career or word something like a relationship or a marriage it's a little bit less obvious because it's more socially acceptable and it's masked by but you know by all these other layers of stuff and it's very easy to say well I'm marriage I mean how can you fall to marriage it's not a marriage a really nice thing in fact isn't a marriage the source of true fulfillment and so you get kind of caught into the into that into that trap but in the end what is the difference between someone who is seeking a marriage as an outlet for happiness and fulfilment versus someone who is seeking heroin for that same reason in the end there's not much fundamental difference it's still the same thing what you're looking for is you're looking for something outside yourself to make you happy you're looking for candy and when you do that you're a child psychologically you're behaving like a child you're behaving in a juvenile a an unwise way so what do the Y's want well the Y's want self-control the Y's want self mastery and the reason they want that is because well either they're wise enough to see that none of these are gonna work ultimately that all of these are basically the same and then just because you're moving up the ladder here does not mean that you're gonna actually reach what you're after so they might even they might see it that way or they actually might have experienced it themselves gosh had gone out and tried this stuff and moved up that whole ladder and come to experience and realize that wait a minute this actually doesn't work and the problem is that if I'm not controlled myself then it doesn't matter what I'm doing it doesn't matter where whether I'm at a cool party whether I'm where I'm Snowden snorting coke whether I'm having amazing sex whether I'm in a really good marriage or whether I have the best career in the world it doesn't matter if I'm not control of my own emotions if I don't know how to control my own thoughts if I don't understand myself on a very very deep level not just intellectually but practically if I can't control myself I can't control my impulses then there is no chance for me to be happy see the whys they understand this and when they understand this and they kind of surrender themselves to this idea it's it's a very powerful thing and you want to make sure that you're getting to this point in your life you want to make sure that you're getting to the point your life where you're surrendered to the idea that this other stuff even though you can pursue it and there's nothing wrong with a marriage per se there's nothing wrong with going to the gym and there's nothing wrong with going up to a party once in a while or having sex you know that's all fine but you can't you can't really rely on that and in the end everything that that is all pointing to is you it's pointing to your own self mastery and that if if you don't develop a self mastery over your lifetime then no matter what else you do it's not going to really get you to where you want to be and where you ultimately want to be is you want to be at a place of happiness contentment just kind of quiet sober contentment with your life undisturbed unreacted on frantic just very calm very peaceful with what is that's where you want to be and you want to have tranquility you want to have serenity you want to be okay with how the world is kind of the way you might expect like an old Zen master or like a phoo master like imagine that person like a 80 year old Zen master I mean is that guy like chasing around looking for women or is he like going looking for for for snorting a line of coke off off the off the bathroom counter or is he even like chasing for an amazing marriage or is he even really going after some awesome career no I mean he sees he clearly sees through that and he's just like very calm very stable very grounded in the present moment and that's where you want to be and how did he get that way well he spent years and decades developing self mastery self control how did he do that he did that through meditation through disciplined practice through reading through maybe through prayer maybe through through contemplation through whatever whatever means but something that was focusing him grounding him turning him in word rather than turning him outward and that's kind of the approach that you got to take with your life if you really want to reach a stable level of happiness and fulfillment right so be intelligent be wise want self control right what self control forget about the candy the candy you've tried the candy it's taste of good but you know that it's just like a little hit of sugar and that little hit of sugar is not enough to get you to where you want to go so it's time to leave the candy aside you don't need it anymore it's not as tasty as you thought it was self-control that's what's really sweet self-control is so sweet it's sweet on a whole new different level it's sweet on a whole new different scale when you start to move towards it alright this is Leo I'll be signing off this is what I have to say about this profound quote from Rumi go ahead post me a comments down below I'd love to hear what you guys think and then of course please like this and share it click the like button right now and come check out actualize that org and sign up to my newsletter because I'm releasing new articles new videos every single week for free and you're getting the best wisdom that I found through years and years of research about how to develop self-control how to develop self mastery actualize our work is all about becoming self actualized getting an awesome career getting all the externals that you want but ultimately it's developing an inner peace and inner confidence and happiness with the present moment how do you do that the best way that I found is to start to train yourself up train yourself up by exposing yourself to this material repeatedly and then taking action throughout your life and improving in in little small steps until you get more and more and more self control and then your life just gets better and better and better and better I want to keep you on track with that if you sign up then I promise that I will so sign up and you're going to be all set you